Smile

~~~~ Pensive

In, I'm falling in
I didn't want to
Not so fast boy
Slow
Don't wanna hurt the girl
Give her a pretty box
You'd better fill it

And I get blinded when she opens the door
It's like looking in to the sun, you know
And I'm just blinkin', mumblin', starin' at my shoes
And she just looks at me
And smiles
Smile, smile

Oh, there we go again
And it feels so good
Of fallin' up and down
Damn, it's 2am again
And she kisses me goodbye
For the sixteenth time

And I'm drivin' home, it's 5am
And I'm look at the sun come up over the hills
Clouds are turnin' pink and green
And all I can see is her eyes
Eyes, eyes

And I get blinded when she opens the door
It's like looking in to the sun, you know
And I'm just blinkin', mumblin', starin' at my shoes
And she just looks at me
And smiles
Smile, smile

Currently Listening: Out of this World - Bush

I Am So Flippin Pumped!

~~~~ Happy

Summer '08

~~~~ Exhausted

I am officially all moved into Laura's apartment in Cincinnati. I love it. It's so nice to have a roommate that I'm living in intimate quarters (aka a relatively small bedroom) with that I am not uber creeped out by. Internship starts tomorrow. Sooo excited. Ramsey, the dog that lives here, is without a doubt one of the cutest dogs I've ever seen. I'm so glad I get to play with him all summer. This week I'm just gonna fall into the swing of my internship then next week I'm gonna start following up on all those job applications I put in last week. Things are looking up.

Except I am not wise in the life decisions department because yesterday I decided to go up to Cleveland for Steph's birthday and thanks to my extreme lack of sleep I am exhausted. Oh well. I guess I'll get a good nights sleep before the museum. But Steph's birthday was a really good thing for me for two reasons. #1. We went to a strip club. Strange reason, I know but it's one of those life lessons I have lived and am proud to say that I've experienced it. #2 When we went out to the bar I got hit on twice. One was the awkward 'I'm gonna awkwardly talk to you trying to keep the conversation going in hopes that you'll end up in my bed' which happens every once in a while. But the first guy did the I'm gonna slid up to you all sleezy like in the bar and try to hit on you. Never happened to me before. It gives me hope that maybe I'm not as undesirable as I'm slowly making myself out to be. Not saying I was remotely interested in either guy but, in that stereotypical girl way, it's nice to know I'm "appreciated". Maybe there's hope afterall.

I Quit

~~~~ Restless

On boys, school, and life in general. I've been disappointed by three seperate boys this week. At first I was crushed, especially by the first boy, but now I'm so over it. Three days left until the semester is over. Only two classes left. Tomorrow I need to study for Anthropological Theory and probably I should fix my Myth paper. Thursday's the Anthro Final and Friday's the Myth Final. Then I'm going home for two days and then it's back to Cincinnati for my internship. That's life. I'm so over that too. Life. I should be excited because I'm doing something I love for the summer and then senior year I have a great schedule. But there's still a part of me that feels like it's not worth it because no one else cares. I was so close to at least a little happiness that now that it's gone I kinda don't care anymore. That's a lie. I do care a lot but it's more of an I'll care once I'm out of this place and down in Cincy. I've become a recluse to my books. I've decided for the next year I'm gonna keep track of how many pages I read in pleasure books. I dunno why. I've always wanted to do it... There's something wrong with me. I feel restless.

Currently Watching: Family Guy

~~~~ Hopeful

"An artist is always alone - if he is an artist. No, what the artist needs is loneliness." - Henry Miller

Currently Watching: Matilda

~~~~ Crushed

Who knew you could heal my heart and then break it so quickly. I was just accepting the commitment thing I'm so afraid of. Even if I can't keep you anymore can you still keep me?